Why Do We Seek Approval?

Horse Therapy clients often all wonder the same thing. Why do we tend to seek approval so much in our lives? It's a great question and it's something that almost every human struggles with to some degree or another. 

"According to “Understanding the Psychology of Guilt” on eruptingmind.com, most children were taught from a young age to seek approval from their parents for the things they said or did. Since the need for approval, love and acceptance from our parents is strong, we become conditioned over time to seek approval from others as well. Whenever we don’t receive approval from someone who is not our parent, there is an automatic trigger and desire to win it back (which could explain the yearning to open that closed door).

When we aren’t met with approval, we no longer feel safe and protected. “When we meet ridicule or rejection, it can undermine our view of ourselves,” stated the previously-referenced article on advancedlifeskills.com. “If we internalize this kind of negative feedback, we can begin to doubt our personal worth. This threatens our sense of security and disrupts our inner harmony.”"

 

"To end on a more uplifting note, “Who Needs Approval” discusses what it means to hone in on self-validation. “When you act or speak in a way that makes you feel good about yourself, stop and acknowledge it. When you work hard on a project or goal, find a way to reward yourself. It is not egotistical to give yourself acknowledgment.”

Though in reality we are affected by our external environment, we can try not to embody rejection as a reflection of who we are; it’s important to maintain self-love and compassion, regardless of what occurs outside of ourselves."

 

I thought Psych Central did a great job in overviewing why we tend to reach out to others for approval. To read the rest of the article click on the source link below! 

Source: http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2012/09/20/what-drives-our-need-for-app...

 

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